… Stan Kaczmarek

I have often been confused about who I am and what I do. Now I am a blogger… that means I am supposed to be funny. But I am also an an environmental engineer, and that means I am supposed to be serious. In these pages hopefully I can be both. But if I am ever too much of one and not the other, let me know. After all my purpose in blogging is to continue a lifelong quest to make a difference in the lives of people I don’t even know, and I hope that through your comments and contributions to this blog, you will make a difference in mine.

If you are interested in my professional history, take a look at my LinkedIn Profile. After reading that, you may wonder why I decided to spend a career with waste. You will not be the first. When I first told my mom that I decided to get a graduate degree in what was then called Sanitary Engineering, she looked puzzled. Rather than hurt my feelings and embarrass me in front of the rest of the family with whom we were sharing a Sunday dinner, she whispered in concern like any good Italian mom would, “After 4 years of college, do you really want to become a garbage man? You are better than that! Is it the Mafia? Are they telling you to do this to repay some debt? I knew that my uncle’s gambling was going to get us in trouble one day. Do you want me to make a call and get you out of this?”

I should have known at that point that there was always going to be trouble getting people to accept what I do. I stopped my mom from making any calls and explained that I was going to be a sanitary engineer, not a sanitation engineer. I told her that my graduate school was going to change the title to environmental engineer hopefully to make it clearer. I explained that we were being taught to design systems to improve water quality so that people can fish in, swim in, and maybe even drink out of the lakes and rivers and bays and oceans that surround us. I told her, yes, the type of engineer I was becoming could take waste from people’s toilets and bath tubs and treat them, but I would be doing so much more than that.

Then I saw tears in her eyes yet they were not tears of joy. I asked what was wrong. She said, “I’m sorry, Stas,” …that’s my Polish nickname, “but all I can think of is Ed Norton from the Honeymooners. He was funny, but if you are going to work in the sewers, that’s not funny. I mean, what if there are alligators there? It’s dirty and dangerous. Can’t you help the world in other ways? I thought you always wanted to be a doctor or a priest. It’s not too late for that, is it?”

“Ma,” I yelled, “Stop worrying!” I told her that environmental engineering was nothing like that, that we were needed to collect and treat waste and residues from all types of human activities and detoxify them before putting them back on or in this earth. We were needed to protect the earth by acting to repair it and keep bad things out of it. We would become the doers, not the complainers. We wanted to be the first wave of college graduates who would show that you can do well by doing good. I asked for her blessing and begged her not to worry any more. This quieted her for a little while but I knew that she would soon find something else to fret over because that was the major right and responsibility in what she perceived to be a mom’s job description.

My mom left this world 6 months ago, and I didn’t realize how much I would miss her parental wisdom. I do. She always tried to be protective, and I always told her to stop worrying. But even though she is now gone, I continue to hear her warnings. Just like many businessmen friends, I hear her whispering, “Don’t let everybody know what you are thinking. They can use that to hurt you.” Well mom, if your spirit is reading any of this, please accept my push back. In this new world, if we really want somebody else to care about what we are saying, we have to be honest enough to reveal at least some of what is behind our walls for that may be the only way to generate trust. And that is what I hope this blog will promote… trust.

Finally in terms of my lifelong quest, I hope that this blog will allow me to continue doing good. In terms of doing well, I guess that can wait. But at least I know I won’t do worse. Why? Because if she can find a way, I know that my mom will have my back.